MacTrump and his better half are back in their private suite cum playroom. The President’s face is glowing; it’s now scalded umber.
MacTrump: Now Melanie, you’re the First Lady but you Cannot go against me in Front of the Guys.
Generalia Melania: How long have ve been married, huh? And you still get my name wrong! (she aims a swipe at his head)
MacTrump: Don’t you touch the Hair!
Melania feigns a swipe with her right hand and brings her left over and unravels the Hairdo.
MacTrump: You Slovenly Ska…
Melania: Don’t you dare!
MacTrump: Why can’t You be More like Nancy Reagan, eh?
Melania: Who? Iz one of your floozies?
MacTrump (slapping his forehead): Come back, Ivanka.
Melania: You want divorce. Great. I keep Barron.
MacTrump: Over my Dead Body! Or yours!
Melania: Ze vorld knows about Stormy Danielz but vhat about ze rest, huh? And ze Moscow business.
MacTrump: You wouldn’t dare.
Melania: Try me, fatso burnt face.
MacTrump: You Speak good American when you want to.
Melania: Vhat about my countrypeople? Vhy you don’t help the Ukrainians more anyway? You’re scared of Vlad ze Pudding?
The phone rings and the Prez answers.
MacTrump: Sat Whaaat? Ok, I’m on My Way.
Melania: Vhat?
MacTrump: Its happened. The Slovenlians have been Attacked.
Meanwhile in Moscow…
Vladimir Pudding is walking along the corridor his office, his left arm swinging like a soldier’s and his right rooted to his hip like an Irish dancer. He looks at the handsome sentry as he passes. He thinks to himself: Mmm, he’s new and very yummy.
Sergei Lapdog has to give the bad news to his Tsar of All the Russias.
Lapdog thinks: He’s going to be really pissed off. He’ll give me that death stare.
Pudding: So, Sergei, tell me. I can see from your jowels that it’s not good.
Lapdog: The Slovenians are now involved in the fighting.
Pudding: So? They’re in the Ukraine so the Charter doesn’t count. MacTrump won’t do anything.
Lapdog: But the rest of the NATO countries?
Pudding: They will dither and make noises, that’s all.
Minority News Report 